Friday

Bah, Picard.

Recently I completed my epic viewing quest: five seasons of Star Trek The Next Generation. Star Trek seldom fails to make me chuckle; at times I can't help guffawing. The main theme is not nearly as hilarious as the theme from the Original Series, but other than that, I enjoy TNG immensely. Except for one character. Captain Jean-Luc Picard (aka Patrick Stewart) is a thorn in my side. It's not that he's out of place because he actually can act. It's because he has such a vexing take on human history. I mean, he's supposed to be the resident archaeological buff on board, but apparently only on random alien moons. He reads Shakespeare and 40's whodunits, but honestly...that seems to be the extent of his Earth knowledge. As I'm from Earth, I resent his posturing, preachiness, and galling self-righteousness. (Uh-oh. I didn't think I was a Trekkie, but I'm starting to talk about this guy like he really existed.) What right has he to blandly talk about how savage humans used to be, how they even warred over "economic principles"...*cough cough, you mean communism?coughcough* (turd. that's like saying we fought Nazis because of their religious principles. saying we had a choice.) He assures visitors from the past that humans don't fight anymore, 1) because they've evolved -don't ask-, and 2) because humanity somehow eliminated all need for personal possessions and any want of any kind. go figure...they bred out Original Sin. I suppose his bad attitude has to do with the fact that there is absolutely no religion and a whole lot of boring and overstated agendas. But even if it's not his fault, every time he shows up (when I'm watching by myself...and that's 99% of the time) I chuck a pillow at the tv. Even so, I'm still pining for unwatched episodes. It's a sickness.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

i keep trying to comment ... but it doesnt let me, and maybe this will work.

SO. jean-luc. really? i mean, yeah he's annoying, but he's also prof x!!! doesnt that merit SOME love?

Catherine_Creagan said...

I dunno...I mean, he let Jean Grey blow him up. That wasn't very competent.

Anonymous said...

ouch. touche.

Anonymous said...

Jean Grey didn't blow him up. Some black bird did. Or something like that.

Besides, I thought that was supposed to be part of Professor X's charm. He's not all-powerful.

Actually, I'm done defending that film. It was a mess.

8-)

Catherine_Creagan said...

He wanted to be bald?

Anonymous said...

Yeah! and have a supposed-to-be-French-but-who-are-we-fooling-might-as-well-stick-to-British accent.

Actually GR wasn't nearly as involved in TNG as the original series. TNG is largely Rick Berman's baby. I think JTK is who GR really was - after all, he was carrying on with two cast members simultaneously and wanted to marry both (one of them declined the honor - makes you wonder about the other).

And I'm pretty sure GR knew diddly squat about archeology on obscure moons.

Anonymous said...

i was going to leave a snarky comment about the disturbing amount of ST trivia knowledge being thrown around ... of the "how do you KNOW this stuff" variety

but then i remembered how in my maimonides class the other day, my prof made some reference to starwars, and it was kind of off in the distinction between the good and dark side, so i launched into this "yeah, but not really because ..." thing, until i stopped and realized that i was getting the "how to you KNOW this stuff" look from pretty much everyone. so i shut up.

[but inside i was still annoyed by the lack of precision in the sw ref]

Catherine_Creagan said...

It would make more sense I think for GR to want to be Kirk. Picard...just isn't that attractive. Not that Kirk is either, but he definitely had more success for some reason.

It can be very embarrassing if Star Wars comes up in conversation...people attempting to quote it...me, furiously biting my lip to keep from correcting them and being termed "geek"...ah, my life is so difficult.

Anonymous said...

I KNOW! Like when some goomba on the radio refers to "Ewoks from the planet Endor" in a knowing way. AArg! Endor is a moon!

Whoa...glad I got THAT outta my system...

Anonymous said...

We just posted at exactly the same time. Cosmic.

Anonymous said...

And what's wrong with being a geek? I cheerfully correct people when they misquote...things like "Beam me up, Scotty;" "Elementary, my dear Watson;" and various Shakespeare whack jobs. Sad.

Catherine_Creagan said...

Yeah! Like when people say "Alas, poor Yorick, I knew him well"

As if Horatio weren't even there.

Lenor said...

How are people missing the most important element of this story which is WE KNOCKED ORIGINAL SIN OUT OF THE EQUATION.....I've got to get on the stick and patent this method....any takers?

Anonymous said...

Yeah - could you put it in chewable form so I can give it to the boys?

Oh and Catherine, what do you think of this update I read recently: "Whoa, Yorick! Dude, I knew this guy!" Anthony Esolen's (SP?) take on ICEL doing Shakespeare.

Catherine_Creagan said...

ICEL?
forgive my ignorance

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